Have you ever read or heard quotes about money? There are so many money quotes out there and lots that will give you a good laugh!
The interesting thing about money quotes is that lots of them are not only funny but ridiculously true! If you need a good chuckle, keep scrolling for funny quotes about money that are ridiculously true!
Funny Quotes About Money Can Teach Real Lessons!
Though the quotes may be funny, they can really teach a lesson. By breaking down the meaning of the quote, you can find a golden nugget of a lesson!
I feel like we have a lot of quotes from very wise and practical individuals from all throughout history. When I think of some great historical figures, I often think of their quotes as well!
Why Quotes About Money are Funny
Have you ever laughed so you didn’t cry? Or maybe made light out of a not so good situation?
Lots of funny money quotes are made up in that manner. When you take a real life situation and add a hilarious and relatable twist, you can really get a good laugh!
Why are Quotes Meaningful?
Isn’t it interesting that we find significant meaning in the words of others? And those quotes are often from wise people in a different time period?
I think that we find great meaning in quotes because they are relatable and seem to transcend time. Quotes acknowledge the things that we are facing and give us hope, a good laugh or solidarity.
The Best Funny Quotes about Money
These just happen to be, in my opinion, the best funny quotes about money. I hope you enjoy!
- A nickel ain’t worth a dime anymore. – Yogi Berra
- All I ask is the chance to prove that money can’t make me happy. – Spike Milligan
- A successful man is one who makes more money than his wife can spend. A successful woman is one who can find such a man. – Lana Turner
- Money is the opposite of the weather. Nobody talks about it, but everybody does something about it. – Rebecca Johnson
- Money, if it does not bring you happiness, it will at least help you be miserable in comfort. – Helen Gurley Brown
Funny Quotes About Money From Famous People
There are a lot of funny money quotes from famous people! These are my favorite and quotes that will give you a good laugh!
- Money was never a big motivation for me, except as a way to keep score. The real excitement is playing the game. – Donald Trump
- Money is the best deodorant. – Elizabeth Taylor
- Anyone who lives within their means suffers from a lack of imagination. – Oscar Wilde
- Money often costs too much. – Ralph Waldo Emerson
- I love money. I love everything about it. I bought some pretty good stuff. Got me a $300 pair of socks. Got a fur sink. An electric dog polisher. A gasoline-powered turtleneck sweater. And, of course, I bought some dumb stuff, too. – Steve Martin
- Money can’t buy happiness, but it will certainly get you a better class of memories. – Ronald Reagan
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Funny Quotes About Saving Money
Saving money seems easy enough right, especially if it’s on paper. Once you get out into the world, it becomes a little bit harder! These are the best funny quotes about saving money.
- The safest way to double your money is to fold it over and put it in your pocket. – Kin Hubbard
- A simple fact that is hard to learn is that the time to save money is when you have some. – Joe Moore
- Save money and it will save you.
- Beware of little expenses, a little leak will sink a great ship. -Benjamin Franklin
- A dollar saved is a dollar earned.
- You save even more money if you don’t buy anything!
Funny Quotes About Money From Your Favorite Movies and Shows
We all know that movies and shows have some seriously funny quotes! These are the best funny money quotes from shows and movies you may know and love!
- It doesn’t matter if you’re black or white… the only color that really matters is green. – Family Guy
- I like my money where I can see it, hanging in my closet. – Carrie Bradshaw, Sex and the City
- I’m so broke, I can’t even pay attention. – Rodney Dangerfield, Back to School
- If you think nobody cares if you’re alive, try missing a couple of car payments. – Earl Wilson, The Great White Hype
- If money is the root of all evil, I’d like to be a bad, bad man. – Michael Caine, The Italian Job
Funny Quotes About Money and Your Life
Money is one of the most controversial aspects of how you live your life. It also has been the cause of some of the funniest quotes about money!
- Money isn’t the most important thing in life, but it’s reasonably close to oxygen on the “gotta have it” scale. -Zig Ziglar
- If inflation continues to soar, you’re going to have to work like a dog just to live like one. -George Gobel
- Rich people have small TVs and big libraries, and poor people have small libraries and big TVs. – Zig Ziglar
- Money is like a sixth sense – and you can’t make use of the other five without it. – William Somerset Maugham
- Money is like manure. You have to spread it around or it smells. – JP Getty
Funny Quotes About Money and Joy
Finding joy in life is one of life’s greatest challenges. Whether money is a source of joy or not, there have been a lot of different and funny quotes on the subject!
- Too many people spend money to buy things they don’t want to impress people they don’t like. – Will Rogers
- Money will buy you a fine dog, but only love can make it wag its tail – Richard Friedman
- Money frees you from doing things you dislike. Since I dislike doing nearly everything, money is handy.” – Groucho Marx
- Whoever said money can’t buy happiness didn’t know where to go shopping. – Bo Derek
- Money can’t buy happiness, but it can buy beer. – Gary Reilly
Funny Quotes About Money Borrowing and Lending
Whether you are the borrower or lender, transferring money is a stressful experience full of unknowns and assumptions. It also has provided the inspiration for some great quotes!
- A bank is a place that will lend you money if you can prove that you don’t need it. – Bob Hope
- If you lend someone $20, and never see that person again, it was probably worth it. – Author Unknown
- Always borrow money from a pessimist, he doesn’t expect to be paid back. – Author Unknown
- Acquaintance, n.: A person whom we know well enough to borrow from, but not well enough to lend to. – Ambrose Bierce
- If you know the value of money, go and try to borrow some. – Benjamin Franklin
Funny Quotes About Money and Taxes
Taxes are a hot topic in all circles. They’ve also provided us with a lot of funny quotes to lighten the experience!
- People who complain about paying their income tax can be divided into two types: men and women. – Author Unknown
- I’m not going to pay taxes. When they say I’m going to prison, I’ll say no, prisons cost taxpayers a lot of money. You keep what it would have cost to incarcerate me, and we’ll call it even. – Jimmy Kimmel
- Dear IRS, please remove me from your mailing list.
- In order to simplify tax collections the IRS has a new, easier to use tax form with only two lines: How much money did you make this year? Please send it in.
- When it comes to taxes, there are two types of people. There are those that get it done early, also known as ‘psychopaths’, and then the rest of us. –Jimmy Kimmel
- Trying to do your own taxes is like a do-it-yourself mugging.
- Taxation is theft!
- For every tax problem, there is a solution which is straightforward, uncomplicated-and wrong.
- If Patrick Henry thought that taxation without representation was bad, he should see how bad it is with representation. – Farmer’s Almanac
Funny Quotes About Shopping and Spending Money
Our days are filled with making and spending money. This has led to some of the greatest and funniest quotes about money!
- Money talks, but all mine ever says is goodbye!
- Money can’t buy happiness, but it can buy you the kind of misery you prefer. -Author Unknown
- A bargain is something you can’t use at a price you can’t resist. – Franklin Jones
- Money is like an arm or a leg. Use it or lose it. – Henry Ford
- There is a very easy way to return from a casino with a small fortune: go there with a large one. – Jack Yelton
Funny Quotes About Investing Money
Investing money can be a terrifying and stressful decision. If you are in a rut regarding investing, check out these funny quotes!
- October: This is one of the particularly dangerous months to invest in stocks. Other dangerous months are July, January, September, April, November, May, March, June, December, August and February. -Mark Twain
- Avoiding the dumb things is the most important. Learn more, know limitations, avoid the dumb things. – Warren Buffett
- A dollar picked up in the road is more satisfaction to us than the 99 which we had to work for, and the money won at Faro or in the stock market snuggles into our hearts in the same way. – Mark Twain
- Number one rule of Wall Street. Nobody… and I don’t care if you’re Warren Buffet or if you’re Jimmy Buffet. Nobody knows if a stock is gonna go up, down, sideways or in f*****g circles. Least of all, stockbrokers, right? – Wolf of Wall Street
- Do you have any idea how cheap stocks are? Wall Street is now being called Wall Mart Street” – Jay Leno
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Funny Quotes About Budgeting Money
Living life on a budget is never any fun. However, it does provide inspiration for some fantastic levity!
- Budget: a mathematical confirmation of your suspicions. -A.A. Latimer
- I am having an out of money experience. -Author Unknown
- We didn’t actually overspend our budget. The allocation simply fell short of our expenditure. – Keith Davis.
- It’s easy to meet expenses, everywhere we go, there they are. – Author Unknown
- Budgeting has only one rule: Do not go over budget. – Leslie Tayne
Funny Quotes About how Money Makes You Feel
How a person feels is a completely personal and unique experience. These individual viewpoints have made for some fantastic humor!
- Empty pockets never held anyone back. Only empty heads and empty hearts can do that. – Norman Vincent Peale
- Car sickness is the feeling you get when the monthly payment is due. – Author Unknown
- I finally know what distinguishes man from other beasts: financial worries. – Jules Renard
- People say that money is not the key to happiness, but I always figured if you have enough money, you can have a key made. – Joan Rivers
- I’m so poor I can’t even pay attention. – Ron Kittle
Funny Quotes About Money and Kids
Kids are always a handful. They also are a great source of humor. Add money to the mix and you are in for some great laughs!
- Blessed are the young, for they shall inherit the national debt. – Herbert Hoover
- Opportunity is missed by most people because it is dressed in overalls and looks like work. – Thomas Edison
- Remember when we cried as kids and our parents said, ‘I’ll give you something to cry about’? We thought they were going to hit us, but instead, they destroyed the housing market. – Author Unknown
- A parent is someone who carries pictures where their money used to be. – Author Unknown
- The best way to teach your kids about taxes is by eating 30% of their ice-cream. – Bill Murray
Funny Quotes About Money and Getting Rich
While what classifies as rich differs with your point of view, we have all desired to reach it. This desire has also been the cause of quite a few funny quotes.
- A rich man is one who isn’t afraid to ask the salesperson to show him something cheaper. – Jack Benny
- I finally know what distinguishes man from other beasts: financial worries. – Jules Renard
- Money is not the most important thing in the world. Love is. Fortunately, I love money. – Jackie Mason
- Every day I get up and look through the Forbes list of the richest people in America. If I’m not there, I go to work. – Robert Orben
- The rich. You know why they’re so odd? Because they can afford to be. – Alexander Knox (Robert Wuhl) Batman
Funny Quotes About Money and Marriage
Everyone knows that marriage is about finding your other half. What some people don’t understand is how much that means you are going to share, including your money.
- He who marries for love without money has good nights and sorry days. – Author Unknown
- Some couples go over their budgets very carefully every month, others just go over them. –Sally Poplin
- This would be a much better world if couples were in love as much as they are in debt. – Earl Wilson
- There’s a way of transferring funds that is even faster than electronic banking. It’s called marriage. – James Holt McGavran
- It’s money. I remember it from when I was single. – Billy Crystal
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I hope that you were able to find some funny, yet relatable money quotes.
What are your favorite funny money quotes? Is there any that I have missed? Let me know in the comments below!